The sounds of panicked breathing fill the air, the heat radiating off these sap’s skin, their
dilated pupils. Every single detail is just so delectable. “D-Damnit, what the hell is goin’ on!” One
of them yells. “I wish I knew man!” Another responds. “I-It’s almost as if a demon swooped down
upon us!” Another bloke says. Eh, they’re close enough. The building’s power was shut off
hours ago, and everything plunged into darkness, but all of it is as clear as day to me. “Make
sure whatever it is doesn’t get to the boss!” Presumably their leader orders. They all shout in
agreement and split up. Hahaha! What buffoons! The ceiling makes the slightest noise as I
straighten my posture and casually stroll across it. I find another helpless welp and descend
upon him with a speed unheard of. I grab onto his face and pull up to the ceiling and stare into
his horrified eyes, my blood starting to boil. I whisper into his ear “Rule one when dealing with
paranormal, phantasmic, holy, and unholy threats,”

And swiftly spin his neck into a three-sixty. “Always stay in formation dear~,” A devilish
and toothy grin spreads across my face. My sharp teeth shone in the flashlight of the soldier’s
rifle. I rig him to hang from the ceiling by his intestines and dash down to the ground, my black
and red suit rustling, and my leather shoes clacking as I land. I grab my pistol from my shoulder
holsters and fire a few rounds before retreating back to the shadows. The soldiers clamor about
to find their colleague strung up like livestock. They form a tight square formation. Good, they’re
learning. The lights on their guns frantically searched every inch of the room before landing on
my lanky figure.

One of the dogs howls in terror and opens fire, the rest following suit. I was already
above them before they pulled the trigger, but their fear is intoxicating. I bet it’s time to reveal
myself. I fall to the floor and land left leg extended, my fingers pulling my hat over my face only
revealing my smile. I stand and tip my hat. “Gentlemen!” I exclaim. “Pleased to make your
acquaintance.” Their sights are all trained on me, trigger fingers itching to pull. “My name is
Morticia Von Restving,” I bow with my hat on my chest. “But my acquaintances call me Dahlia,
Sundew, Jackal, Jackie, take your pick.” My evil grin on my face. I stand straight and put my hat
back on. “Unfortunately for you all, this will be our first, and last meeting.” A confused
expression across their faces as they burst out laughing. “YOU! You look like a wannabe Jazz
singer, go back to New Orleans you pretentious fu-!’ But the soldiers cut off due to his tongue
seeming to be missing. He screams, well as well as a person without a tongue can scream, in
agony, and writhes on the ground. The guards shake in terror as they try to check on their dying
friend. I appear above the lad. “Tsk, Tsk, sweetie. Didn’t your mummy tell you that if you have
nothing nice to say,” I say while I hold his tongue in my palm. “Don’t say anything at all.” My
devilish grin returning, my knife-like teeth bared, and my eyes glowing an ominous silver.

The rest of his friends scream in terror and grab for their guns and fire but I duck the
shots and pull out my pistol, popping four out of five in the head. The leader stumbles over his
legs and crawls his back into the door I need to breach. I aim the gun at his head, my gloved
hand wrapping around the trigger. My gold plated rings feel tight on my fingers. “Nine
millimeter,” I say. “W-What?!” He blubbers. “Nine millimeter spring loaded custom made .45
Reaper model ll. That’s what this lovely little thing is.” I say as I stroke the barrel of the Reaper,
a nicely weighted gun at about 120 kilos, the color red with a black scripture reading “See you in
hell” along the barrel. Each magazine holds 6 Heavens Banes tipped rounds. The perfect
mythological creature slayer. “The point I’m making darling,” I say while I grab him by the collar
of his shirt and slam him against the door. “This wonderful piece of British engineering is great
for quick kills.” I throw him into the air, kick him through the door, and shoot him in the head as
he flies across the room. “And for dismantling the souls of sinners.” The barrel of my pistol
smokes. At the end of the office, a desk placed between two windows has a young man filing his
papers with a small lamp being the only source of light for him. I step over the dog’s corpse and
walk towards the desk and sit myself atop it, grabbing my cigarettes and lighting it with my
pistol. I take a long inhale and stare at the young man. “Sir, under the Hell and Heaven treaty of
1000 A.D, section 31 page 108 it states how the selling of both weapons from Heaven and Hell
are prohibited to humans”

I snap my fingers and the treaty appears before him. “And you violated the treaty.” He
sighs and cracks his fingers. “I take it you’re the Punisher of Heaven.” I smile my toothy grin and
exaggerate my arms into a bow. “At your service.” He stands and takes his reading glasses off.
He’s a lanky man, with long arms and legs, a lanky face, and sharp eyes. “Here to take me to
court?” I laugh at his question and point Reaper at his forehead. “The courts of Heaven and Hell
don’t have time for a petty, small-time merchandise peddling, waste of breath.” And he
noticeably tenses up, a smile forming on my face.

“Whenever Heaven or Hell occasionally have a pest problem, they send me. The best
exterminator in all nine realms. They send a gun for hire, rather than a holy warrior, or a demon
of unspeakable horrors after pathetic weaklings like you!” He yells in outrage grabs my arm and
throws me into the bookshelf nearby. “I AM THE SON OF ASMODEUS, I DO WHAT I PLEASE
YOU MONEY GRUBBING, TACKY, ANNOYING EXCUSE OF A DEMON!” I laugh as I lay on
the floor, a real hysterical one. “Please,” I shoot to my feet. “Do you think these grade school
level insults mean anything? And demon? Really? I’m insulted you’d think me one of those
barbarish brutes!” I ask, causing him to grind his teeth. He starts to contort to grow larger
muscles. Scary eh? He grabs my collar and punches me repeatedly, my flesh ripping off each
hit. He finally throws me into a window shattering and impaling me. I cough some blood and I
smile. I remove the glass but he fires multiple clips of ammo into me before I can get up. “HOW
DO YA FEEL NOW?!” I stay silent. The eerie silence is deafening. The brute huffs and puffs as
he returns to normal form.

“That’s what I thought, all talk, no bite. Like a dog.” He spits at me. I jump to my feet at
the word and my eyes glow again as my flesh returns to me. “I haven’t had a thrashing like that
in ages!” I shout as I laugh hysterically. “How about I go all out too?” I snap my fingers and my
rings fall off my fingers, sudden power surging through me. “Yes! This strength! This power!” I
shout as a silver shroud consumes me, transforming my suit into a proper warrior of holy and
unholy. Heavenly armor, but a demonic body. I stare and smile at his terrified voice. “W-What
kind of monster are you?!” I laugh hysterically. “I AM BOTH THE LIGHT AND THE DARK! THE
SUN AND MOON! I AM WHAT HAUNTS YOU IN YOUR DREAMS, I AM THE ETERNAL
TERROR OF MANKIND! I AM FEAR INCARNATE!” I shout in a bloodcurdling tone as my body
morphs into a mass of eyes and rings circling around me. “MORTALS AND GODS ALIKE
DON’T DARE UTTER MY NAME!” He starts to crawl away as I close in on him.

I suddenly disappear and appear behind him. “BUT I WILL GRANT YOU THE
PRIVILEGE OF KNOWING MY NAME!” I howl which startles him so much he jumps. “My name,
my sweet ignorant boy, is Algaphotic,” I whisper into his ear. His pupils dilate and he starts
writhing in pain while he clutches his head. I put my twin gold rings back over my gloved fingers
and grab Reaper. “You have committed treason against all the lords of the heavens, rulers of the
underworld, and the ones above them,” I mutter. “They have therefore decreed that the sinner
and heretic be punished for his misdeeds.” I squint as my eyes glow again. “Theo only thing that
awaits your hollowed soul is punishment beyond comprehension, where no pity and no
compassion will be showed to the likes of you,” A smile creeps along my face. “Allow for the sea
and souls of the damned to judge you.” A shot rings out. “Pray you’re granted undeserved
mercy.” I say as the barrel of my gun smokes. Another night. Another contract closed.